Happy Valentine’s Day my friends! Click on the ecard to spread happiness & fun. 🙂
Army Wife & Operation Homefront Executive Director Strong Chick Carol
Happy Military Monday! Meet another amazing Strong Chick, Carol Herrick! She is the Executive Director of Operation Homefront of Oklahoma and Arkansas. IÂ had lunch with Carol a few months ago to discuss Happy First working with Operation Homefront. Carol is so sweet and just amazing. And she gave me a glimpse into the military world and I just fell in love with her and what she does. She helps so many people! And Operation Homefront is such a wonderful organization. I am excited for Happy First to be giving to Operation Homefront (and several other military organizations) with Happy First Strong Chick sales.
Here is Carol’s Strong Chick story-
I am a military spouse that has been married to my Soldier for almost 22 years. He has been in the Army for 21 years—yup, we got married first! He was a chemical engineering student at the University of Maine, came home one day and said “Honey, I did this thing today and I am not sure you are going to like it, but it will be okay”. It turns out it was the second best decision he has ever made!
The first time we came to Fort Sill, it was June and it was HOT. I thought “Oh goodness, where did you bring me”. I was a very naïve girl from New England. The second time we came back to Oklahoma , I asked “the Army really doesn’t look at those wish lists they have you fill out do they?”. The THIRD time we arrived at the gates of Fort Sill, I said” Alright, there is something that I am meant to do here…” We haven’t left yet.
I rolled up my sleeves and got to work. I have worked with military families for approximately 15 years in a variety of volunteer and paid positions. Three years ago, I got a call to interview for a nonprofit that helped military families and wounded warriors. With an amazing dedicated Board of Directors, a  grant for my salary and $1,100,  we began an amazing journey. It has been  scary at times, and really pushed me outside of my comfort zone but I think I have found my calling. What we have been able to accomplish in three years is amazing, and I am very proud of the work we do. I love getting to know the families we serve on a personal level and helping them through some of the most difficult challenges of military life. They truly are MY family.
Strong Chick Gold Star Wife Jane Horton
Happy Military Monday! I am so honored to introduce you to my friend Jane Horton. She is a rock-a true Strong Chick. I am in awe of her. She is amazing and wise beyond her years. She is a very accomplished woman and I know great things are in store for her and she will help many people. Here’s her story.
On September 9, 2011, my life Was forever changed. The love of my life, Â my hero,my protector, and my partner was killed in Afghanistan. SPC Christopher Horton was only 26 years old. That night, that lonely Friday night where I sat in my room alone trying to process everything, I quickly realized
I had to sink or swim. I wanted nothing more than to curl up in a ball and cry for the rest my life, but I knew that wasn’t an option, it was up  to me to make that decision, and I chose to swim.
Well, little did I know that I would be swimming and swimming for weeks months and even years to come. You never can stop swimming, or you’ll drown. The tide and the constant flow of water will take you under if you succumb to its power. Each of us has own trials, and each of us has our own battles to fight. It’s up to us whether were going to pick up our weapon and find valiantly, or succumb to the enemy. When I married my husband, I had no doubts about us; I knew that we are meant to be together. If we were so meant to be together, why would my husband be taken away so soon? God has more plans for my life, and I am ready and willing to take on a full life and finish all my time on this earth.
Being a strong chick doesn’t mean that I’m made of steel. It doesn’t mean that I’m a brick wall  that nothing can knock down or penetrate. Being a strong chick also means that you’re willing to be vulnerable, and let your true colors and your true self show. It’s letting the world see who you really are instead of putting up a front. It’s never giving up, never letting go, and eyes fighting hard to the finish. True strength comes in and letting our weaknesses show, and even when we know that we are tired from battle,  we put on our brave face and we step out into the day.
You don’t really learn what you’re made of of until every part of your being is tested. That’s when you really realize who you are and how much you can handle. Each of us has it within us to fight and overcome our challenges-  And that’s what makes us all strong chicks. No matter what you’re going through, no matter what trial or tribulation, there is always hope. Each trial may makes us stronger, gives us more endurance, and make us more proud when we look back on all we have overcome. Each of us is a strong chick and I encourage each and every one of you to never give up the fight. No matter how long the night, the dawn will always break.
PS-(this is Debbie). Jane is one of our founding Strong Chicks. We asked her to choose a charity that she would want us to donate to when people bought strong chick items from Happy First. (People can choose their military charity upon purchase on the site). Jane chose AmericanSnipers.org and this is why (in Jane’s words):Â 
I picked Americansnipers.org because many brave warriors train extremely hard for one of the Army’s toughest schools- Army Sniper school. Although many claim to be a sniper, there are few who have actually passed sniper school and carry their b-4 identifier. On top of that, few actually deploy as combat snipers. With the military budget as strained as it is, many snipers are deploying without the proper equipment they need in order to do their job. Not only this, but sniper equipment is very expensive and vital. This organization helps our country’s elite fighting forces purchase the equipment they need in order to safely take out the enemy and complete their mission. Snipers are one of the most vital assests the military has- they are cost efficient and much more accurate than the average infantryman.
PS again! You can order a Chris Horton memorial bracelet at Hortonbracelet.com .Â
Strong Chick Former Sgt USMC Lauri Rottmayer
Meet Strong Chick Lauri Rottmayer, I am so excited to introduce you all to her! She is amazing!
Here’s Lauri’s story-
I’m Lauri Rottmayer, former Sergeant, USMC. I joined the Marine Corps when I had just turned 18. In fact, I was even part of the birthday celebration of October birthdays in bootcamp and I adore cake. I breezed through high school in three years. After I graduated, I took a year off to try and figure out what I wanted to be when I grew up. I decided I wanted to join the military. I went to the Air Force recruiter who told me that there wasn’t really any room for me and I’d have to wait.
My uncle, a Captain in the Marine Corps, caught wind of what I was doing and told me there was no other branch of the service to belong to but the Marines and so I decided to go and see that recruiter. Who was thrilled to see me and signed me right up.
I was selected in bootcamp to go into signals intelligence and after I graduated was sent to NTTC Cory Station in Pensacola, Florida where I met my husband whom I’ve been married to for almost 34 years. We got married at the age of 18 after only knowing each other for 3 months because the military doesn’t guarantee to keep you together but if you’re married, there’s a little bit better chance they will.
Our first duty station was at Camp LeJeune, NC which is where I earned my secondary MOS of Marksmanship Training Instructor. Turns out, I was a pretty good shot and was even chosen to shoot on the rifle and pistol team!
Fast forward all these years, we’ve been all over the world, and for the bulk of my recent adult life I’ve been involved in pageantry. I entered my first pageant at the age of 37 and won the title of Mrs. Congeniality. During this time frame I also competed as a bodybuilder for the first time. I loved the muscle and being strong so, after competing in pageants for three years, I decided to direct them.
I love the International system where I was the Oklahoma director for five years. It is a community service platform based pageant that put me in touch with the most amazing, strong women who were doing incredible things in their communities for causes they were passionate about.
I gave up my directorship when we had plans to move to Saudi Arabia. When the move was cancelled, we spent the next year doing a variety of projects. We lived in our house, an apartment, an RV and a cabin. Now we have just struck out in a whole new direction and moved to Sallisaw, Oklahoma. With him at my side and the world as our oyster, I can’t believe how excited I am!I’m glad I’m a strong chick because I feel like it helped to lay the ground work for everything I’ve done in my life. I know that one I want my granddaughter to learn is that women can be strong and it’s okay. I plan to show her that by example.
Thanks, Lauri! Check out Lauri’s blog-Rott-i-Tude (wow, she has some real strong chick pics!) and website, Laurirottmayer.com.
Lauri has a quote on the cover of her facebook page that she said is very important to her- “The secret of happiness is freedom. The secret of freedom is courage.” -Thucydides
Coping with Cancer from a Caregiver’s Perspective
My vision for Happy First is to be a place where people can come and connect with each other and be inspired. Through one of my blog posts in particular- My Hodgkin’s Lymphoma Survivor Story I have seen people encourage and help one another in going through cancer. I am so thrilled that Cameron and Heather Von St. James found Happy First and asked to share their story with you all. The perspective from a caregiver is often overlooked. Here is their story; I know it will touch and encourage others and also create awareness.
Being a Cancer Caregiver is Hard: How I Coped With My Wife’s Diagnosis
My wife has said more than once that she has no idea what I went through when she was diagnosed with mesothelioma. Despite talking about it once, it’s a difficult thing to understand when you experience a struggle like this from different perspectives. Neither one of us had any idea that three months after our daughter was born we would be dealing with cancer. We had no idea that our joy would end and anger and confusion and fear would replace it. I watched tears run down Heather’s cheeks when her doctor told her she had cancer. All I could do was wonder how we would get through this. 

The anger is something I remember vividly. I used a lot of profanity for a while. I finally got my act together and made sure I was strong for my wife. I needed to be her rock. I made it happen, but it wasn’t easy. I had a long list of things to do that I didn’t think I could handle. Aside from the regular things I had to do such as work and caring for my wife and daughter, I had travel arrangements to make, treatment decisions, and doctor’s appointments to deal with. It didn’t take long before I started accepting all the generous offers of help that our friends and family approached me with. We were so very lucky to have that help and support during this difficult time. It helped me to prioritize our lives. I was still overwhelmed, but much less so. 

The most difficult time in all of this was immediately following Heather’s surgery in Boston. She needed time to recover before she began her next phase of mesothelioma treatment: chemotherapy and radiation. Fortunately, her parents were already watching Lily for us in South Dakota, so Heather hopped on a flight and spent the next two months with them recovering. Because I had to stay behind to work, I was only able to see my family once in those two months. I missed Heather and Lily so much.
I visited them one weekend, and spent 11 hours driving each way. I left on Friday after work, drove through a snowstorm, and did it all over again on Sunday so that I didn’t miss any work. It was a long, grueling trip from only a few precious hours of time with them, but it was worth it to see my family. 

This was such a difficult time for me, but I don’t regret the decision to stay home and work. I had to help our family the best way that I could. Since we were so fortunate to have her parents help with her recovery and with Lily, we were able to make this decision. It was difficult, but it was necessary. It was the best decision for our family at the time, which is the only reason I don’t regret it. That was six years ago. Heather is healthy and happy now, and I am wiser from all that I learned throughout her cancer experience. I learned that I have to accept help to get things done. I learned that we were lucky to have all that we did in that department. I hope that my experience can help even one person with their own experience with cancer.
A little about Cameron-
“Cameron is husband to Heather Von St. James, survivor advocate for the Mesothelioma Cancer Alliance, and father to Lily Rose. He, along with Heather and young Lily, had their worlds turned upside down when Heather was diagnosed with malignant pleural mesothelioma, just 3 1/2 months after the birth of his only child. When faced with the very real possibility of raising Lily on his own, he fought alongside Heather in her battle with mesothelioma. It was his determination and refusal to compromise on doctors or treatments that led them to Boston to receive radical surgery from esteemed mesothelioma surgeon, David Sugarbaker. Heather continues to thrive 6 years later.
Through out the next few years, while being a caregiver to Heather and dad to Lily, Cameron returned to school full time to finish his degree. He worked full time, went to school full time and graduated with high honors at the top of his class in June of 2010 with a Bachelors of Science in Information Technology. He was soon offered a position at US Bank as Network Analyst and continues to pursue his career.
Like Heather, Cameron is passionate about bringing awareness to mesothelioma and the dangers of asbestos exposure. It is his hope that sharing his story will help others those battling cancer and their caregivers who provide them care and guidance in their journey.”
If you would like to connect with Heather, check out her facebook page.
2013 Word-Everyday Mindfulness
Hi everyone! I am still collecting people’s words for 2013. I asked my good friend Kelli Lene to share her word with you-
Everyday Mindfulness
Like many of you I am contemplating what lessons I learned in 2012 and what my priorities are for 2013. This leads to the major challenge of identifying the one word that sums up my focus, both personal and professional, for the year. After much introspection and herbal tea, I have finally recognized the perfect word ( drum roll…..) 2013 is now officially the year of “Mindfulness”.
Mindfulness was originally associated with Zen Buddhism, now it’s intrical with all types of meditation used in psych, Yoga and other wellness practices. However, if you are anything like me, the idea of practicing meditation translates to a daytime nap. And I feel the same way about naps that I did at 5 – at my core I know I need it, but Maaaaaaaaaaama all the other kids are up and I’ve got things to do.
As you can imagine, my 20 year journey from corporate suit to a neuromuscular therapist has led me to become much more in touch with the components of mindfulness in my treatment room. My beloved yet spotty yoga practice has upgraded my awareness even more and brought those components into by personal arena. Now life has exposed to me some amazing women who walk the talk and (despite my best efforts) have been a good influence on me. So this is the year I am going to up the ante.
A semi official description of mindfulness comes from John Kabat-Zinn : “paying attention in a particular way, on purpose, in the present moment, and non-judgmentally ” Mindfulness, like a lot of concepts, can be incredibly complicated and interpreted in a wide variety of ways. For me it means to spend a lot less time on auto-pilot. The trick is how to make it happen simply, consistently and meaningfully.
I approached this venture the same as I do any large project: research, determine goals, and plan specific steps. My plan is to focus on one facet a month, committing to making it a part of my everyday life. The twelve features are:
January: Breath work
February: Body Scanning
March: Meditation
April : Connection to Nature
May: Non- attachment
June: Openness to Experiences
July: Being Present
August: Connection to Myself
September: Acceptance
October: Non- judgment
November: Compassion
December: Connection to Others
Practicing these components will help bring me to the beauty of the present moment. And can’t we all do with a little more beauty in our lives? My wish for you and me is a year full of beautiful moments that we are mindful enough to recognize.
Here is Kelli’s bio-I love her story, she is a true Happy First Chick, she left the corporate world to pursue her passion-
Kelli Lene’ is the owner of Time Well Spent, a consulting and professional development company primarily serving the wellness industry. She has been involved in professional education since 1981 when she began her career as an adult educator specializing in customer service and client relations for the retail/ hospitality industries. Based on a need for personal fulfillment, she embarked on a new direction – as a massage therapist and spa technician. Eventually, due to her corporate background, she had the opportunity to merge the her two worlds – as a spa owner, consultant and eventually as a massage/spa program director.
Time Well Spent is a culmination of all these experiences. The company offers neuromuscular services, corporate wellness programs, special events, professional education and consultation. Since 1994 Time Well Spent has worked with schools, manufacturers, spas, and therapy centers. As an acknowledged industry expert she has participated in all aspects of professional development including publishing, curriculum development, trade shows, and workshops.
As a business owner, Kelli understands firsthand the difficulty of keeping so many balls in the air and still maintaining balance. Her main strategy has always been to have every branch of her business balance the others thru a shared vision –“That every moment invested with her…. is time well spent”
Kelli has a passion for her chosen career and is devoted to combining her experience in education with her love of wellness in order to contribute to her community. That is why she is currently working towards her next project – a personal and professional retreat called Spa Kamp.
(Kelli is also the ultimate Pinterest Chick (think I need to do a Pinterest Chick tee or cap?) -check it out- Kelli Lene Spa Kamp-she has incredible boards and ideas!))
Strong Chick Military Mom Virginia May
It’s Military Monday at Happy First!
Meet one of our Strong Chick Military Moms-Virginia May.
Here is her story. She is awesome!
Strong Chick Virginia May
I have several family members that have served in various branches of the military:
John Caldwell- maternal grandfather, Army WWII
Claude Williams- father, Oklahoma Army National Guard
James May- husband, Air Force for 8 years. Serving in Germany four of those, where my stepson was born.
Marvin Beaver- step father in law, Army
James May Sr. – father in law, retired Navy
Wally May,-nephew, Navy currently stationed in San Diego
Although knowing that each of these men in my life served their country, it did not have the meaning to me as when my own son joined.
SPC Kendall Tallon E-4 graduated from Thunderbird Youth Academy in December 2010. The following January, at age 17, I signed for him to join the Oklahoma Army National Guard. This past August he changed units and volunteered to deploy sooner than planned with the 120th Engineer Battalion and is now in Afghanistan for 9 months.
When my son went to basic combat training I searched the internet for support. I found the Broken Arrow blue star Mothers Chapter 5 located at 81st and Lynn Lane in Broken Arrow. I started volunteering in February 2011 when my son left. I was able to become an official member when my son graduated basic in April 2011.
I remember the first time that I volunteered and we were packing boxes for deployed soldiers. We packed items such as food, snacks, toilet paper, condiments like salt, pepper, ketchup, mustard, etc. I was immediately humbled at how we take for granted the little things from home. I feel like I am closer to my son while he is away from home serving our country by volunteering weekly at Blue Star Mothers.
I am currently the 2nd Vice President of the Broken Arrow Chapter 5 in charge of fundraising. We support all branches of the military. This is a group of wonderful ladies who are so supportive. We come together for our children and each other. They are my rock and this experience would be much harder without all of them.
Right after my son deployed with his new group from Florida, we sent an additional 96 boxes to those troops. We didn’t have names for the individuals yet, so each box was addressed to my son. I can only imagine that he felt like Santa giving out those boxes and the instant camaraderie that was made amongst some of those soldiers.
To send a box to a soldier it takes approximately $50. These funds come directly from the Blue Star Mothers and their fundraising efforts. The major fundraisers of this chapter are a BuncoRama, Golf Tournament and a Softball Tournament.
I am grateful for all of the military and their families for the sacrifices made.
p.s. (this is debbie) When you purchase a strong chick tee or cap, you can choose which charity you want our contribution to go to, and Blue Star Moms is one of the charities! Blue Star Moms is funded by the money from the fundraisers and donations from the community.
Celebrate January-International Creativity Month!
Happy Tuesday! I meant to write this yesterday but didn’t get to it and I think it was meant to be because I took this picture late yesterday afternoon. I was talking on the phone looking out the window and this bright happy cardinal was just sitting there wanting his picture taken! And it fits with what I want to talk about.
I love January-way more than December. December is somewhat stressful and busy for me-I need to enjoy it more. It is hard for me to slow down in December. I love January because it is fresh, all about reflection and then new beginnings-which is exactly what Happy First is about. I love setting goals for the year and thinking of new possibilities and planning it all out. I love the fresh start of a new year.
I’m really loving my new word FOCUS for 2013. And one thing I want to focus on is my creativity. I have gotten so busy running a business that I haven’t nurtured my creative side. Last year I read the book “The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron . It is a 12 week workbook designed to help you find your creativity. It suggests taking “art dates” with yourself and doing something creative once a week. So I will keep you all posted and I would love to hear ways you all do creative things.
Anyway, I was reading the Sunday paper this past week and came across Harvey Mackay’s article in the business section. I love reading his articles. This week it was entitled “6 tips to help fuel creativity”. He talked about how creativity and imagination are vital for business and personal success. And he also said that January is International Creativity Month-didn’t know that! How fun is that? He talked about how being outside and spending time in nature spurs creativity. That is so true for me. I love to run and that is when I do some of my best brainstorming. I haven’t been outside so much because it has been so cold. But yesterday as I was on the phone I was gazing outside and saw that cute little bird and it made me think how good it is to slow down and enjoy nature. We live on some acreage so it is always so beautiful just to take the time to look away from the computer or some task inside and just to look outside!
Harvey Mackay’s 6 tips to help spur creativity-
1. Gather information – research-don’t think about the solution initially, just delve (love that word-was my word for 2012) into the subject.
2. Let it simmer-do something else and let your subconscious sort it. (that’s when I run!)
3. Brainstorm-take some time to create more ideas from the information you’ve processed. (I sleep on it! In fact, that is how I would prepare for a test in college. I would study and study then nap right before the test)
4. Share your idea-Run it by some friends for feedback. (I’m always asking my creative and stylish friends for input)
5. Accept Mistakes-try things even if you’re not sure they will succeed.
6. Copy other Ideas-Don’t steal other ideas, but look at what’s done and try to do it differently. (I am always looking at trends but want to put my original spin on it).
Then, I love this, he had what he calls “Mackey’s Moral”– and this one is “Creativity, not necessity, is the true mother of invention.”
Wow, I get so inspired just reading what he has to say! I have so many ideas for 2013. I just need to FOCUS and corral all my ideas and give myself time just to have fun and create.
What do you all want to create? What helps you get in the creative zone?
What’s your Word for 2013?
Happy January 1st my friends, and Happy 2013! As you know, I love to celebrate firsts and new beginnings! I love the start of a new year, it is so fresh and fun and full of possibilities. I view life as a big adventure and I love to experience new things.
I’m spending this week reflecting on 2012 and planning for 2013.
Yesterday on my Happy First facebook page I asked the question- Does anyone make resolutions? The first response came from a dear friend who said she doesn’t make resolutions, too much pressure and she doesn’t want to be disappointed. Someone else agreed. Wow, that is so foreign to me, I am constantly setting goals. I am so Type A, have trouble slowing down. And I look at this dear friend and wish I was more like her, so balanced and calm.
But we have to work with who we are right? And that is what makes everyone so fun and different and that is what is great about having friends and a spouse that are totally opposite of me. They keep me in balance!
So back to my Type A goal setting-ha ha. (By the way, check out my earlier blog post about setting goals) Every year for the past few years I have chosen a word to embrace for the year. It started in 2010-my word was Create, 2011 was Pursue and 2012 was Delve (delve in 2012). I encourage you all to think of a word and frame it so you can see it every day. This year I am putting it on my desk.
Before I tell you 2013’s word, let me reflect on 2012. I chose Delve. I wanted to learn new things. Well, I did learn new things, but I think my word should have been Explore for last year, because I did so many things on the surface but didn’t really delve or get good at any of them. I looked into classes at our local community college and took all of these classes last year (I dragged some friends with me too to these classes)-Adobe Illustrator, Adobe Photoshop, Adobe Indesign, a 5 week photography class (I got a digital SLR for my birthday and wanted to learn how to really use it) and a jewelry stamping class!
I learned new skills and met fun people, but this year I want to really FOCUS so that is my word for 2013. I have said that before, I am spread too thin. I want to be super business owner and super mom and super volunteer and experience everything! Well, I can’t be good at everything if I am overextended. I am really going to work on my schedule and say no more and when I am working I am focusing on work-no distractions-and when I am doing family things I am with family. I love Yoga-one of the things they are always saying is BE PRESENT-so I am going to work on being present!
Some other ideas I came up with for some good words-be LEAN in 2013-that can be like lean in being fit or lean in your business. I had New Year’s Eve dinner with cousins last night and I was asking them their word ideas and my cousin Ralph said Lucky 13 for 2013. So maybe 2013 will be your lucky year! (as you may know, I have a lucky chick tee and I wrote about Luck).
But I digress, I must FOCUS on my word FOCUS. What is your word for 2013? I love hearing everyone’s ideas! Let’s inspire each other! Happy 2013!
 ps-I tend to want to make everything perfect. I could have spent hours choosing the perfect font or drawing up something to frame. Instead, I just chose to keep it simple! So it is not perfect, but it is already sitting on my desk.
Happy First Day of Winter!
Happy First Day of Winter, friends!